open* -Fleeting g h o s t s .x

[Risa [Isis]]

[glow=red,2,300]

It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you
There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do

[/glow]

A harsh sun glinted, blinding to any feline who dared view it from the wrong angle. Worse still, it broke through the cold leaf-bare without a care and shone off the water's surface. The river was a pale blue, tumbling over the rapids with a low, rushing sound that slowly droned into a background noise. It carried leaf-fall depress farther downstream, towards the lake that surrounded Star Island. Upstream, it started as a small stream emerging from the woods at the base of the volcano that gave SparkClan its name.

Something shifted among the thick shadows cast by the charred undergrowth. It was only visible for a second, a flash of golden fur that disappeared behind a fern bush, before a cat of the same colour appeared. The feline paused, lifting his head high to taste the air for enemies, but it obviously found none as it stepped forward again.

It was muscular, with short, yet thick, golden fur and tabby markings in a darker shade. It's eyes were a peculiar turquoise colour, and his ears switched back and forth to catch any sounds. One of his forepaws was dipped in a creamy beige.

The tom made his way towards the river, reaching the shore and crouching down. Long tail curled along its flank, Lightstar bent his head and a flash of a pink tongue appeared as he lapped at the cold water. It trickled down his throat, and a shiver tore his back in response. He pulled back, gazing at the water, deep in thought.

The water, almost clear but not quite, seemed to flash silver in the sun's glare, and the sheen reminded him of his mother. Silvermoon. He sighed heavily, his eyes half-hooded as he thought of her; the leader missed her deeply. He stared, unblinking, feeling the saddness overwhelm him. For a moment he even thought he saw her reflection in the rushing water, her blue eyes gazing back at him with a lost affection.

But then the current washed her away, and he was alone again.

[Fawn <3]

A short gray tabby broke through the underbrush and came into view. She did not hold her head high, as she usually did. Many troubling thoughts overwhelmed her, heavy as weights in her small head. She was supposed to be out hunting, but little time had actually been allotted to searching for prey. Her green eyes had instead become clouded as she wandered through the forest, letting her senses become dull and her mind take over. It was a very mouse-brained thing for a warrior to do, but Brackenleaf couldn't help it.

What would life be like, if I weren't a warrior? she thought. To even imagine such a thing did not seem possible to her. Even her leader was once a warrior, every cat in the clan went through the warrior ranking. Except the medicine cats,she amended quietly. She should just stop dreaming about other things, as this was the only option her father had provided. Of course, Brackenleaf would indeed become a queen one day, but a permanent one? She was sure her father would be disgraced, and having no knowledge of her mother, she couldn't help but think she would disapprove as well. Her father would never approve. It was foolish to imagine otherwise.

Tasting the air, she noticed the river was nearby, and decided to stop for a drink. Brackenleaf also came upon another cat scent. Immediately on the alert, she stole closer to the water and relaxed when she realized it was just her leader. Brackenleaf fixed her green gaze on Lightstar's back, wondering what he was doing. Probably moping again,she mused.
Deciding there was no harm in conversing with the tom, she bounded up to where he sat and smiled.

"Hi Lightstar."

[Risa [Isis]]

Lightstar heard a cat's slow pawsteps, his ears swivelling to catch the sound. He turned, glancing over his shoulders, figuring that whoever it was was just going for a walk through the forest. Still - he didn't like being surprised. He caught a glimpse of Brackenleaf, before she bounded to his side.

"Good morning, Brackenleaf," he greeted, dipping his head in acknowledgement. His eyes sparked, showing a hint of the old, wise leader sleeping within him. "What brings you out here on this fine day?" His tail twitched as he relaxed again, throwing a side glance at her. He didn't mind a nice chat every now and then, but he often found it hard to be the first to start it.

ooc;; sorry, crappy post D=

[Fawn <3]

ooc; I'm kinda slow today x]

Brackenleaf's ears twitched, and she tilted her head skyward before looking back at her leader. Amazing, she mused, for a moment he sounded like his old self. Those were the days...

"Exactly that, Lightstar. The fine day brings me out," she replied cheerfully. She shook herself once and bent down to briefly lap at the flowing water before sitting up and returning her attention to the tom before her. I hope that wasn't rude, taking a sip in the middle of the conversation with a leader. I'm just really thirsty.
Brackenleaf dipped her head once quickly, to apologize for her rudeness.

Grinning sheepishly, she added, "Well, I'm supposed to be hunting, but I can't seem to find anything at the moment. I've already made a trip back to camp with some fresh-kill, so I figured I'd take a little break."
The gray tabby flicked her tail back and forth gently(if that even makes sense xP) as she waited for an answer.

[Risa [Isis]]

ooc; lawlz, sameee xp

bic;;
Lightstar nodded thoughtfully in reply to her comment, though he didn't reply. He glanced back the river, watching it glide by. For a moment he wished Silvermoon's reflection would come back, but then the living she-cat by his side distracted him.

He saw her dip her head from the corner of his eye, her pink tongue flicking out to lap at the water, and he turned his attention back to him.

The leader couldn't help but chuckle quietly as she bowed her head in apology. He flicked his tail in a silent gesture showing he did not mind. "That sounds good," he purred in reply, his golden fur ruffling slightly as he shifted so he was facing her.

There was silence for a moment as he let his words rest, musing silently. Lightstar felt like stretching his limbs, and a hunt would help. He had been planning on catching a few mice on his way back to camp, and company couldn't hurt. Brackenleaf was already here, so it didn't take much to scrounge together the next few words.

"Perhaps I could join you when you return to hunting?"

It was more of a question than a statement of his authority, as if he were asking permission; he still minded his manners, when there were cats around for him to mind them.

[Fawn <3]

ooc; Testing: Bracken

ic; The slender tabby eyed Lightstar, concerned as to why he would be asking permission to go hunting. Surely he could do whatever he wished? He was SparkClan's leader, after all.
Ah well, what harm could a hunt do?

Brackenleaf winced a bit at the thought of hunting with her leader. What would she do if she messed up? StarClan, please don't let me make stupid mistakes this time, she pleaded silently.
Suddenly, quick as a flash, her mind had thought of an idea.
If she messed up in her warrior duties in front of her leader, that might show she wasn't meant to be a warrior, and he would easily grant her permission to become a permanent queen.

The green eyed she-cat sighed, and shook her head to clear away the disloyal thoughts. They aren't really disloyal, protested a small voice in her mind, It's just another way you can serve your clan to the best of your abilities! She rolled her eyes at herself. "Honestly, why can't I ever think thoughts that make sense?" Brackenleaf grumbled under her breath.

She eventually realized she hadn't answered Lightstar yet, and suddenly felt embarrassed, hoping her expressions hadn't quite reached her face yet.
"Why, of course you can Lightstar," Brackenleaf replied warmly, then congratulated herself for keeping her emotions out of her voice.

ooc; Meheh, she's going through a rather weird phase xD either that or she's sleep deprived. Yeah, let's go with that x]

[Risa [Isis]]

ooc;; rofl, brackenleaf is cute, talking to herself like that! x]

bic;;
Lightstar kept his gaze trained on Brackenleaf, not in a stalkerish way but more like curious as he waited for her reply. Patiently, he watched her, the seconds ticking by silently. He noticed her flinch, then sigh, shaking her head as if she were thinking, of something that made her argue with herself.

The SparkClan leader wasn't at all sure what could have triggered these actions, however. He let his mind wander, though he didn't come upon many plausible solutions.

He pricked an ear at her mumbled words, and held back a laugh; something he hadn't been compelled to do in a while. He didn't personally know Brackenleaf, he realized, and wondered if she normally talked to herself, or if it was just a temporary thing. Maybe he would get to know her on their hunt, which she finally agreed to.

"Thanks," he smiled, his face glowing with the smile in response to her warm tone. The bright blue-green eyes sparked, and he bent to take another lap from the rushing river, before pushing himself to his paws. "Are you ready for a hunt now?" he asked, his tail tip twitching twice.

[Fawn <3]

Brackenleaf smiled again, and nodded her head while speaking.
"I'm all set here I believe. Ready when you are."
Drawing a paw over her ears several times to wash them and hopefully stop an itchy feeling, she stood up.

The green-eyed she-cat stepped to the side a bit, so that Lightstar could pass through and take the lead. I probably should have dipped my head, she added as an afterthought.

As she followed her leader, the short gray tabby continued the inner battle with herself about whether or not to purposely mess up. She wondered what Lightstar would say, and if he had ever been in the same position.

She decided for a tentative, indirect approach.

"Um, Lightstar?" Brackenleaf inquired quietly. Although she herself wasn't focused on the hunt that much, the tom might be. Plus, she really didn't wish to scare off all the prey that were probably hiding.
"I was sort of wondering about something, and I thought I'd ask you about it. Did you ever...consider your future before you were leader? Did you really think you would become SparkClan's leader when you first became a warrior?" she hesitated before adding, "I mean, I was just about through with my apprentice training at the time you did, and I had sort of always thought I would become just a warrior. No more, no less. I never questioned it, I just... expected it. But did you yourself ever consider becoming more than just a warrior?"

[Risa [Isis]]

Lightstar felt a small smile flicker upon his lips as he pushed hmself to his paws, glancing over at Brackenleaf. The tabby padded away from the river, his tail flicking slowly as he breathed deeply, tasting the air for prey. He scented a squirrel nearby, but before he could slip into the hunter's crouch, the gray she-cat spoke up. He stopped himself, turning to face her inquiringly. "Yes, Brackenleaf?"

As she spoke, he listened carefully, his ears flickering. She fell silent, waiting for his answer, but he was still thinking. "No," he meowed in response, his words coming slowly as if he were pulling them out from the river, fighting the current.

"I didn't really wonder whether I was going to be leader or not. I had never really thought about what I was doing, or going to do - I just did my best for the Clan." Thinking back on it now, he realized he had displayed many leader-like qualities even as a warrior. That sort of surprised him. "I just did my best for my Clan, putting my skills towards the good of SparkClan. And, now . . ." He wanted to say that he had become a good leader, but that was a lie. So he let it trail off, his eyes glittering with veiled emotion.

"But, why . . .?" Curiousity spurred him on, and he wondered why she was interested in this - was she not happy with the life of a warrior? His tail twitched and he opened his maw, about to contnue his question, before stopping himself. He didn't want to pry.

[Fawn <3]

Brackenleaf smiled encouragingly, "..and now you are SparkClan's great leader, no matter what the other clans think," she finished for him.
The gray-furred she-cat bent her head to study her paws, mumbling to herself.

It's tell him now or never mouse-brain! Come on, what's so hard about telling your leader you don't want to be a warrior?
"Maybe the fact that that is almost equivalent to being disloyal and not putting your clan's best interests at heart!" she murmured under her breath.
Big deal, the voice urged, It's not being disloyal, as I've said before, it's just finding another way to serve the clan!

Brackenleaf shook head to clear her foggy green gaze. "Oh, well, no reason really," she replied sheepishly, before adding, "Okay, actually.. Well suppose a cat is an apprentice. Let's imagine his name to be.. oh i don't know..Fernpaw?"

Nodding her head and staring at Lightstar but not really seeing him, she seemed to be elsewhere as she continued her hypothetical situation.

"Let's say Fernpaw had always imagined he was going to be a warrior, and that he had waited many moons to become one. But then, when he finally has his ceremony, after several moons he decides he doesn't want to be a warrior. Oh sure, of course he still wants to be part of the clan and serve it, but he thinks the best way for him to do that would be another way. He is conflicted with the thought of telling another cat, especially his leader. He feels disloyal by wishing he was something else, but he really wants to show his loyalty another way," the she-cat paused before rushing through the next part.
"He's afraid to speak of his problem to others, and so forever doomed to spend a life feeling disloyal because he believes his place is elsewhere in the clan."

Brackenleaf finally looked up from her paws into Lightstar's gaze, and her voice quavered a bit as she asked, "What would you suppose to be the best course of action for me?"
Realizing what she had just blurted out, she tried to quickly fix it by saying, "I meant, FERNPAW!" but it was far too late. She was sure the tom had caught her slip.

[Risa [Isis]]

ooc;; LMAOOO! XDD

bic;; Lightstar blinked appreciatively, his turquoise gaze taking on a hazy glow at her kind words. He wasn't sure if they were true or not, but he was glad Brackenleaf still respected him enough to say something like that. The pale tabby's hackles ruffled as he settled down in a seated position, ears perked as he caught the first few words she mumbled.

But before he could really understand what her words meant, she had continued; some story about about an apprentice named Fernpaw. Lightstar held back a chuckle, realizing that Brackenleaf was talking about herself. Instead of saying anything, however, he listened intently, his tail curling around his creamy paw.

At the gray she-cat's slip, a small smile spread upon the leader's lips. He flicked his ear, tilting his head slightly as he thought. "Well, Brackenleaf," he began thoughtfully, deciding to keep with the story of the confused apprentice, "I would advice your friend, Fernpaw, to come forward and speak to his leader. I'm sure his leader would understand - not every Clan cat is cut out for the life of a warrior.

"There are other ways to serve your Clan, and each are important. Take the medicine cat, for example. No cat's skills would be fully appreciated if they walked on the wrong path; a medicine cat trying to fulfill the duty of a warrior would be, like, a bee trying to do an earthworm's job. StarClan has a special destiny for each cat, and who is any leader to stand in our ancestor's way? If this friend of yours is ready to talk about it, then I am here to listen to his - or her - thoughts."

At the last few words, Lightstar smiled warmly at Brackenleaf, even going as far as to wink. He wondered what she was interested in, then he remembered seeing her by the nursery talking with a few kitting mothers just the other day. He had thought nothing of it before, but . . .

[Fawn <3]

ooc; Bracken enjoys muttering to herself. It's like an addiction .

ic; The gray feline was thankful that she couldn't possibly flush or she would have been beet red by now.
At least he didn't laugh outright at me, she mused, I'd bet any other leader would've just dismissed me.

Brackenleaf wondered why Lightstar would take such trivial matters into a discussion at all. Before, he wouldn't really have done such a thing unless he believed it was important for the clan. He really is a wonderful leader for SparkClan, though the other cats may not think so. So what if the other clans mock him? We know his true nature, and though it hasn't been that great lately, he's still a good leader. He just needed to find it in himself and dredge it up to the sunlight. [ooc; Wow that was seriously corny. Or mushy. I'm scared by myself ]

Her honey-undertoned fur shimmered and shone as she paced back and forth while she decided whether or not to just come out with it.

"Well, FERNPAW," she grinned, enjoying the fact he kept up with the charade for her sake, "..should be definitely coming to his leader very soon."

A few leaves and grass stalks had landed on her pelt, and so Brackenleaf shook herself twice before looking to make sure her pelt was clean.
"OKay, okay, you've got me," the she-cat laughed softly before taking on a more serious tone, "Lightstar, I'm pretty sure my path lies with the queens, and my place in the nursery."
She took a deep breath and locked her green gaze on his, and continued, "This isn't just a whim, it's something I've thought about long and hard. I've had to wonder if I could live everyday with my decision, and when it comes down to it, I think to myself: Of course I will! There will be so much joy in my life with kits, and I could help take care of the queens or kits if they get sick or injured. I mean, I know we are supposed to do our part to help queens and kits as warriors, but..." she trailed off, training her gaze on her paws.

Brackenleaf cleared her throat, twitched her tail once, and said, "..but I want a family of my own. It's such a joyful thing to have kits, and especially a partner who cares for you and is there for you. Sure, I can go and visit my friends' kits anytime after I finish my warrior duties, but I want to have my own. I want my friends to visit me in the nursery for once. I want to look at my precious kits and spoil them and nurture them, and help them grow. And when my kits become apprentices, then warriors I want to groom them so they look their best for their ceremonies, and as I get older watch them proudly serve their clan."

As the she-cat looked up, there were tears in her eyes, threatening to spill over. Whether from joy or sadness the tears came, she did not know. But one thing was for certain. She wanted to become a queen.

[Risa [Isis]]

Lightstar nodded slowly, watching the gray feline pace before him. He waited as Brackenleaf took her time, summoning up the words - and perhaps the courage - to explain her dilema. His tail twitched, and he felt a small smile beginning to grow as she talked about having her own kits. He briefly wondered if she had a mate yet, but he would leave that task to her.

He could tell from the emotion in her voice, and the way she spoke, that she had indeed thought this through. It was something that she really wanted. And just as he had said before, if it was StarClan's path for her, he coudn't very well stop her. He wanted to help her achieve her dream.

When she had finished, she glanced up at him, her eyes shimmering. Were those tears? Lightstar felt almost taken aback, wondering if those were tears of joy or sadness.

"Brackenleaf, I know now that you would make a wonderful mother. Of course you may move into the nursery - SparkClan could ask for no better head queen," he told her truthfully. The tabby's voice was a warm purr, and though he did not give quite as speech as she had - those days had seemed to disappear - he would be proud of himself if they brought joy to her face.

[Fawn <3]

Brackenleaf's eyes grew as large as the moon. "You really mean it? Thank you very much Lightstar," she exclaimed, her voice becoming stronger with each word. "I will do everything in my power to help the queens and their kits!!"

The feline paused and her eyes clouded over slightly, signifying she was deep in thought. Brackenleaf wondered about her own status as queen. "I suppose that won't happen anytime soon," she sighed quietly to herself.
You never knooow! A little voice sang in her head.
Oh shut UP already! I can't even tell if my brain is my own or if it's two separate cats anymore,Brackenleaf muttered, viciously shaking her head to chase away the errant thought.

She began hurriedly trotting in a circle. (if that makes sense xD)
"Oh there's so much I can do!" she announced enthusiastically, and at full volume, "I can bring the nursing queens fresh-kill, and help the medicine cat when they fall ill -StarClan forbid-, and I can help with the kits by playing with them while their mother is out, or even-"
Brackenleaf rambled on excitedly. The gray she-cat appeared to be hopping, or skipping -whichever you prefer- back and forth, and her tail whipped around so quickly you could hardly keep track. It must have been a very amusing sight for the slightly older tom in front of her.

ooc; teehee, Bracken has a bit of a sugar high right now. xP

[Risa [Isis]]

ooc;; LMFAOOO, Bracken is adorablee!!!! *stranglehuggles* 8DD

bic;;
Lightstar chuckled deeply, a low quiet sound deep from his throat, and he nodded once. The tabby gave a grunt, confirming his answer with the informal response.

As Brackenleaf began rambling, hopping around in circles like a raving squirrel, Lightstar leaned back slightly, watching her with curious, shining eyes. The bitter beginnings of a leaf-fall sun shone down, dappling through the brittle branches of the forest. He hadn't seen such a display of . . . excitement . . . in such a long time.

As she continued, the leader wondered if he could ever be as happy or joyful about something - and be strong enough to show such emotion - anytime soon. Probably not, but he was still proud to know she was happy. He was glad he could help her reach her goals. A smile curled his lips.

"The queens will be glad to have you amongst them," he inturrupted gently, his voice slightly louder than hers - she was still rambling, talking more to herself than to him. His tail twitched, and he kneaded the ground. "Would you like to head back, and see your new den?"